Do you have a fundamentalist Christian in your family?

[MrMax]

Every one of my gay friends has either a brother or a sister who is super born again Christ-y.
My sister listens to Joel Osteen and hangs off his every word and she watches DayStar non stop.
I tell her in a polite way that these preachers are all bullshit. That if you ever watch these people they just say a bunch of fluff and nothing concrete, but she just eats it up.

It seems like a really good scam actually. All they have to do is get on a stage and tell the people in the audience how horrible and selfish they are and make them feel guilty, and they give the preacher millions of dollars for this.

Do you have someone in your family like that?

[tombarr]

That's exactly the kind of family I grew up in. My father was the minister of a Church of Christ, one of the most conservative christian groups that I know of. I grew up attending every church service, every class, every bible study, and listening to people lecturing others on their sins all day long. I came away as an adult with the understanding that it's all one big sales pitch and fear of death and what happens after are the mechanisms they use to sell their product...and the more you accept their preachings, and the more you give to them, the better you will be after you die seems to be the crux of it all and frankly i didn't buy it and as such, I put as much distance between them and myself as soon as I was old enough to leave home.

[rawTOP]

My parents are big Jerry Falwell fans. (I guess that should be past tense now that he's dead). When Dad retired we moved to Lynchburg VA to be with "brother Falwell" and I spent a year of high school and a year of college in his school/college. I'm still technically a member of his church since I never joined another church after that point... Mom and Dad did finally leave his church, but only because the music was too loud for Dad's hearing aide!

But Falwell was nothing compared to the church we went to when I was in kindergarten/1st grade... That one was a 5 point Calvinist church that believed they were "the elect" (the chosen of god who are destined from birth to go to heaven). They were a weird bunch - though there was one blind woman who could cook the most awesome bread pudding (it's still to this day my favorite dessert).

And the mention of Joel Osteen reminded me... There was this guy at IML (http://www.imrl.com) who was hitting on me who was a big Joel Osteen fan. Thought it was sorta funny given the setting...

[dzinerbear]

I don't have fundamentalists in my family, however, when I was about fifteen I became "saved" and joined the Born Again movement. It was a way for me not to be gay. My family wasn't "saved" and in fact, they were against me going to church.

I started off in the Baptist church, which is about as conservative as you can get in Fundamentalism. Looking for more and more excitment, I moved through a number of denominations until I finally ended up in a sect beyond the Pentecostals. We made the Pentecostals look conservative — speaking in tongues, slaying in the spirit (when the people fall backwards), tambourines, dancing in the spirit, however, we didn't dance with snakes. The services were wild and inspirational and we really did believe everything they were throwing at us.

I have a funny story. When I was about 17-years-old, maybe 18, I read a book about a gay man who was delivered from homosexuality. When the homo demons were cast out of his body they left as foam frothing out of his mouth. I hadn't had much luck shaking the gay thing and still had sex with guys all through my church going days. I felt guilty as hell and wished it would go away. I decided this was why it hadn't: the demons were still inside of me. I used to go to these Full Gospel Businessmen's dinners where'd they'd book a banquet room at a Holiday Inn, have a dinner, and some inspirational speaker would come in and talk.

On this particular one event the speaker was really dynamic, and when he did the prayer call at the end, I decided it was time to take care of these demons. So I went forward. One of his second-stringers came over to pray for me and I was disappointed. I told him that I was gay and wanted to be delivered. He freaked out a bit, but did his best. He said a short prayer, patted me on the head, and sent me away. I wasn't satisfied, so I said, "They're still in there."

"Who's still in where?" he asked.

"The demons ... the homosexual demons ... there are hundreds of them ... I can see them." And I really believed it at the time. He really started to panic and ran for the big preacher. When he told the preacher the situation The Big Gun came a running at me. I was not prepared for what happened next, and as I was there with a gang of friends who had no idea I was gay, I probably wouldn't have done what I did had I known what this guy was going to do. (Sheez ... a lot of tenses in that sentence.) This preacher grabbed a hold of me and screamed, "I COMMAND YOU HOMOSEXUAL DEMONS TO COME OUT!!!" The whole room stopped dead and I thought I was going to die on the spot. Everyone was focused on me at the front of the room.

Anyway, there were no frothing demons coming out of my mouth. I felt the same as I did when I walked into the place except I was now really embarrassed. Shortly after that I told God that if he didn't like who I was then he could go fuck himself. And I began my life as an openly gay man.

Michael

[MiamiBoyz]

Yes, my brother is a "born again" Christian...the rest of my family is very religious as well but no big surprise since most of them live in my home town of Independence Missouri (Bible belt ground ZERO)!!

Couldn't wait to get out of that shithole when growing up!!

Lee

[cbl_chaz]

Fortunately, I didn't have the whole religion thing shoved down my throat. My parents are Pagans, so Sundays were a day to sleep in mostly. We attended an Episcopal church with some family friends for a while and their son and I were altar boys together so we didn't have to sit with our families. I introduced my mom to the MCC church that I attended with a guy I dated briefly and she fell in love with it (she's such a "Flame Dame"). She, my stepdad and my younger sister and brother are still members of that same church. For those that aren't familiar with it, MCC or Metropolitan Community Church, is a nondenominational church that is primarily comprised of the LGBT community. They put the teachings of religion and faith in a more contemporary context and never guilt anyone into being faithful to their beliefs. It's pretty cool and if I had more time on the weekends, I might attend masses here in Orlando.

[AlexManifestMan]

I was on a bus on my way to Exodus when I decided that maybe being a Baptist wasn't the way to go. Those were some really ugly days with long and tearful prayers to be delivered from the abomination of homosexuality. There is not much sadder than at 17 year old who hopes for an early death before he ever moves from sinning in his heart to sinning in the flesh.

Oddly enough it wasn't my family (although one of my grandparents was a snake handling evangelical) but my friends that got me into the church. The terror of the Rapture and the eternal fires of Hell were very real to me and I spent most of my life from 16-25 knowing that there was no hope because I was just so evil that I could not even accomplish the simple task of heterosexual desire.

It is heart wrenching to hear someone you care for tell you tearfully that they are so sad that you will be burning in hell for all eternity.

Pretty ugly stuff.

[cbl_chaz]

well, for those poor "sheep" that follow the Bible (a book written and rewritten and translated to within one inch of it's life) verbatim, I have this to ask. Doesn't the Bible teach the idea of 'Judge Not, Lest You Be Judged'? Then isn't it a sin for them to condemn YOU to Hell for actions, thoughts or ideals that THEY disagree with simply because THEIR translation of the Bible says those actions/traits are blasphemous?

[camcruise]

One of my sisters is a "born again" Christian... We did not like each other for a long time.
Now we are nicer to each other but sure live in different worlds.

[fetishlad]

Wow - there are actually some guys here who admit that they were a christian and believed in a god?

It does explain a few postings on here when it comes to morals, ethics and responsibility.

I "believe" I am truly "blessed" that I am an atheist and never was submitted to these brainwashing programmes. When I read these stories and look at the state of the world - I truly feel that religions are very evil ideologies.

I am just glad for you guys that common sense took over and that you are no longer believing in these fairy tales.

I can not even start to imagine how much peer pressure you guys must get in the US to become a christian - it is really as bad as islam.

Hopefully one day the majority of people will wake up and assign religions to the history books - so we can all get along together and all make the best of our short life on this planet.

[dzinerbear]

well, for those poor "sheep" that follow the Bible (a book written and rewritten and translated to within one inch of it's life) verbatim, I have this to ask. Doesn't the Bible teach the idea of 'Judge Not, Lest You Be Judged'? Then isn't it a sin for them to condemn YOU to Hell for actions, thoughts or ideals that THEY disagree with simply because THEIR translation of the Bible says those actions/traits are blasphemous?

There's no point in turning this into a debate about the Bible and Christianity. The facts are these: For many of us in our forties or older there were no out gay men when we were growing up , there were no role models — there was no one to help usher us through this very confusing period. And when you're 16 or 17 years old the last thing you want is to be different from everyone else. Imagine a world with no gay porn sites, no Will and Grace on TV, no Metropolitan Community Church, no gay counselling, no Pride days, no OUT Q radio or Genre magazine ... just people calling you faggot in the hallways of your high school. Jesus, and the promise of delivery, seems like a pretty good option under these circumstances regardless of whether it makes sense or not to others.

Furthermore, for every Bible verse you can throw into this, a fundamentalist Christian can drag out six more to prove that they're doing God's work. It's a no-win debate.

Michael

[AlexManifestMan]

I completely understand what Michael is saying. Until you have been there, you really cannot know what it is like. I hated being gay when I was younger because we were taught that there were only three types: sick perverts that kidnap and rape boys, sick perverts that lurked in bus station restrooms in hopes of kidnapping and killing a young boy and finally sick perverts that wanted to cut off their 'privates' and become women. Not much of a choice if you ask me. So no matter how 'good' you were, if you were a queer you have one of three doors to chose. Each of them, of course, led to hell.

As for the Bible verse war, if you go all old testament on someone, you easily make the argument that fat people should be put to death and 'negros' are not even humans.

So it is pretty much like statistics. You can use them/it to argue anything.

[AnthonyDeAngelo]

I lectured a group of young "Christian" adults last night... around here, they all look like hippies and drive old Volvos - I'm lecturing them to let them know about "safe sex" practices... but then, since they're all practicing abstinence, there shouldn't be any need for this type of lecture...right? .... go figure!

[camcruise]

As for the Bible verse war, if you go all old testament on someone, you easily make the argument that fat people should be put to death and 'negros' are not even humans.

So it is pretty much like statistics. You can use them/it to argue anything.

So true!! And dont forget what it says about Woman.

[DirtyRatStudios]

It does explain a few postings on here when it comes to morals, ethics and responsibility.

[...] I can not even start to imagine how much peer pressure you guys must get in the US to become a christian - it is really as bad as islam.

I'm certain there are a greater number of severely damaged gay people in countries where fundamentalist religions are strongest, whether Christian or any other and you can imagine how suffering that trauma during the formative years might manifest itself later. Maybe in abusive types of sex and relationships.

[xstr8guy]

My family is rather godless... THANK GOD! Lol.

One or two may be vaguely "spiritual" and believe in some kind of "god", at least none of them go to church. If any one of them was to become born-again, I'd rush them off to be deprogrammed at some institute.

Btw, all of my family accept my partner and love him. And they even know what I do for a living and don't disapprove. I am blessed with open-minded people in my family tree.

[xstr8guy]

Wow - there are actually some guys here who admit that they were a christian and believed in a god?

It does explain a few postings on here when it comes to morals, ethics and responsibility...

I certainly don't think that morals, ethics and responsibility are the sole domain of religious people. In fact, I think it's just the opposite. It seems that the truly sick, twisted and evil people are always hiding in the church. How many time do we have to hear... "Oh we never would have thought he would rape and kill all of those women! He was a prominent member of the church."?

It seems to me that the "dark souls" are the only ones that need god and religion.

[DirtyRatStudios]

I'm sure that's exactly what fetishlad was saying. He was talking about a LACK of morals, ethics and responsibility in gay people who had a strict religious upbringing.